she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
