Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize