She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
