we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
