Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
