Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize