his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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