we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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