i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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