You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
