i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize