I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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