Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Randomize
