it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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