And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
My dick has a subreddit
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
