I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize