you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
