I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
You smell like a Billy Joel song
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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