He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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