i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
