He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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