i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
