So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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