Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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