everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She's like a pop up book from hell.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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