We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
