she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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