You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize