why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
should my penis look like a turkey
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
