I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
