this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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