every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
