i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize