You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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