im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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