My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
did you just send me my own nude
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
