so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Please don't give away my fajitas
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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