i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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