I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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