Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize