i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
