he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
