hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
