I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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