The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
