There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
