i just made my gag reflex go away.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
