I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
