lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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