weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
We have started to decorate penises.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
