the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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