your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
